Day Four: Last day getting chemo in the chemo clinic!

Well, today we are on day four. This is my last day getting chemo at the chemo clinic. I'll be here next week, of course, for tons of fluids/blood work and the whole deal. But this is my last day getting CHEMO here. Which is pretty special. The nurses at this clinic have been amazing. I can't even begin to express how wonderful they are. Here is a lovely 'last chemo' picture with all of us together:

Gretchen, Eddie, Mary, Kelly, and Sue (and me!)
Last day of in-clinic chemotherapy- 5-29-15

They are some awesome ladies. Doctors may give the orders but it's the nurses that work with you every day, hear your story, listen to your problems, and care for you on a one on one basis. That is something that you never forget when you go through something like this.

So I want to thank all of these lovely ladies for taking such good care of me as I've gone through treatment. From the first time I came in and Sue talked to me with such consideration and empathy about the details of my hair loss to this last week when I asked Gretchen the tough questions about the possible loss of my fertility: thanks ladies for being such a wealth of information and support. 

I'm getting a little emotional here. 

As far as side effects go we're not having anything too rough just yet. A little bit of morning nausea again but that is settling down a little bit. The fatigue is setting in but that's about normal this far into the treatment. Tomorrow is the last day and I am FREE from having these drugs injected into me. That will all be finished up at the hospital so I will have to see if I can track down my favorite nurses there for a picture as well. I don't want to forget the medical staff that have helped me through this with such empathy and care. 

It's hard to believe this is almost all over with. When this all started in February it was hard to believe that it was all going to be okay. It was a struggle to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But now that the light is just a few weeks around the corner: I am blinded by it. And that's a good thing. 

My biggest goal for myself is not to dwell on this but move past it. To not dwell on the fact that it may take a YEAR to know if my cycles are going to return and if I can have more kids. To not dwell on the fact that the chemo might take a toll on my body that I won't see until I hit old age. To not dwell on the fact that mortality is such a fragile concept. But to live. 

And living is such a wonderful thing. Yesterday we enjoyed the nice weather and had some ice cream and park time. Even though I was feeling a bit crummy, seeing my little boy so happy is the catalyst to my happiness. <3