Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Warrior Tattoo and Results Day

Cancer has some perks. They don't make up for the actual shitty cell mutation but they're a good consolation prize.

That's like when you go out to eat and find a giant piece of hair in your pasta after you've eaten half of it. It really sucked and you're going to vomit but at least you get a discount meal next time.

A person in my life suggested the idea of getting a tattoo for strength before chemotherapy. I cleared it with my doctor and off we went! It's surprising how getting a tattoo can really center yourself. The buzz of the needle, the slight but manageable pain, and the resulting beauty. Pain turns into something beautiful.

I guess that is what will happen when this is all over.


The feather will lighten up once it's healed. Feathers in Native American culture (which I have always found fascinating) are symbols of strength, power, and were often given to warriors before battle. (Academic disclaimer: this all becomes unique and altered depending on tribe but I went for a general meaning)

The birds? Freedom from the fight turning to flight. It's all poetic and awesome isn't it? Damn, I'm cool.

I put it on my left arm so when my chemotherapy is stabbed into my port on my right side I can look at this and remind myself I'm a warrior. 

After I've kicked cancer's ass, we will add a quote and turn the feather into a writing quill. Double meanings, baby.

Again, thank you for the tattoo donation. You know who you are.  

I can get my chemo in style on Friday.

In related news, off to the hospital today (home away from home) to get the results of my bone biopsy and PET scan. My doc is optimistic they will be good results but we shall see. I will keep you all updated as I hear the news. It is Adrian's fifth birthday today so I am hoping the day of his birth brings me some good news. After all, this was the best day of my life five years ago.

Random input: that port friggen hurts. Pro tip: if you ever (I hope you don't) have to get a chemo port, DEMAND some pain killers. It's not too heartening when I Google to see that many cancer patients say the port hurts worse than their hysterectomy did. 

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